Rita Rudner
My husband gave me a necklace. It's fake. I requested fake. Maybe I'm paranoid, but in this day and age, I don't want something around my neck that's worth more than my head.
Lewis Black: The International House of Pancakes
You’ll always feel good about your body when you go there — no matter what your body is — because there’s always someone there who weighs 350 pounds more than you’ll ever weigh.