Showing posts from February, 2012

John M. Ford

We’re not lost. We’re locationally challenged.

Charles de Gaulle

The graveyards are full of indispensable men.

Blaise Pascal

I have discovered that all human evil comes from this, man’s being unable to sit still in a room.

Jimmy Demaret

Golf and sex are about the only things you can enjoy without being good at.

Calvin Coolidge

Never go out to meet trouble. If you will just sit still, nine cases out of ten someone will intercept it before it reaches you.


Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe.


Why do you have a hot water heater when you don’t need to heat hot water?

Groucho Marx

Outside of a dog, a book is man’s best friend. Inside of a dog it’s too dark to read.

Bertrand Russell

One should as a rule respect public opinion in so far as is necessary to avoid starvation and to keep out of prison, but anything that goes beyond this is voluntary submission to an unnecessary tyranny, and is likely to interfere with happiness in all kinds of ways.

Alvin Toffler

The illiterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn.

Hari Kondabolu

He’s like, ‘Hey, man, where are you from?’ So I told him, ‘I’m from Queens, New York.’ And then he’s like, ‘No, I mean where are you really from?’ Which, for those of you who don’t know, that’s code for, ‘No, I mean, why aren’t you white?’

Dick Cavett

As long as people will accept crap, it will be financially profitable to dispense it.

Georg Christopher Lichtenberg

Perhaps in time the so-called Dark Ages will be thought of as including our own.

Kurt Vonnegut

There is a tragic flaw in our precious Constitution, and I don’t know what can be done to fix it. This is it: Only nut cases want to be president.


When nothing goes right, go left.

Robert Heinlein

The supreme irony of life is that hardly anyone gets out of it alive.

Robertson Davies

Every man is wise when attacked by a mad dog; fewer when pursued by a mad woman; only the wisest survive when attacked by a mad notion.

Mitch Hedberg

I don’t have a girlfriend, I just know a girl who would get really mad if she heard me say that.

Edward R. Murrow

When the politicians complain that TV turns the proceedings into a circus, it should be made clear that the circus was already there, and that TV has merely demonstrated that not all the performers are well trained.

Clare Booth Luce

Censorship, like charity, should begin at home; but, unlike charity, it should end there.