Fun Quotes Book

Nothing inspires forgiveness quite like revenge.

I’m not worried about the bullet with my name on it… just the thousands out there marked ‘Occupant.’

Now every idiot from high school’s like, ‘I’m back!’ We weren’t supposed to meet again. Stop poking me and inviting me to your weird vampire parties. No, I don’t want to follow you on Twatter. Like, nobody’s interested in you. I don’t want to see you in real life, why would I want to follow you in the imaginary one?

When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.

On a long enough timeline the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.

Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

I never did give them hell. I just told the truth, and they thought it was hell.

Never let your sense of morals get in the way of doing what’s right.

The future is here. It’s just not widely distributed yet.

The end of the human race will be that it will eventually die of civilization.

Humans are the only animals that have children on purpose with the exception of guppies, who like to eat theirs.

Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.

It’s a lot like nature. You only have as many animals as the ecosystem can support and you only have as many friends as you can tolerate the bitching of.