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Showing posts from October, 2008

Oscar Wilde

A little sincerity is a dangerous thing, and a great deal of it is absolutely fatal.

Carl Sagan

But the fact that some geniuses were laughed at does not imply that all who are laughed at are geniuses. They laughed at Columbus, they laughed at Fulton, they laughed at the Wright brothers. But they also laughed at Bozo the Clown.

Franklin P.Jones

Experience is that marvelous thing that enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.

Wernher von Braun

Basic research is what I am doing when I don’t know what I am doing.

Don Marquis

If you make people think they’re thinking, they’ll love you; But if you really make them think, they’ll hate you.

Evan Esar

Play: Work that you enjoy doing for nothing.

George Bernard Shaw

My way of joking is to tell the truth. It is the funniest joke in the world.

Anon

There are 10 kinds of people in the world. Those who understand binary and the rest.

Jules Renard

Failure is not the only punishment for laziness; there is also the success of others.

James Branch Cabell

There is not any memory with less satisfaction than the memory of some temptation we resisted.

G.H.Hardy

It is not worth an intelligent man’s time to be in the majority. By definition, there are already enough people to do that.

Oscar Wilde

Morality, like art, means drawing a line someplace.

Jonathan Winters

Nothing is impossible. Some things are just less likely than others.

Evan Esar

Statistician: A man who believes figures don’t lie, but admits that under analysis some of them won’t stand up either.

Ellen Goodman

Normal is getting dressed in clothes that you buy for work and driving through traffic in a car that you are still paying for - in order to get to the job you need to pay for the clothes and the car, and the house you leave vacant all day so you can afford to live in it.

Lily Tomlin

The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you’re still a rat.

Evelle J. Younger

An incompetent attorney can delay a trial for months or years. A competent attorney can delay one even longer.

Mark Twain

By trying we can easily learn to endure adversity. Another man’s, I mean.

Clive Barnes

Television is the first truly democratic culture - the first culture available to everybody and entirely governed by what the people want. The most terrifying thing is what people do want.

Anon

Time is that quality of nature which keeps events from happening all at once. Lately it doesn’t seem to be working.

Wendell Johnson

Always and never are two words you should always remember never to use.

Will Rogers

An ignorant person is one who doesn’t know what you have just found out.

Lucille S.Harper

The nice thing about egotists is that they don’t talk about other people.

Robert McCloskey

I know that you believe that you understood what you think I said, but I am not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant.

Jackie Mason

Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.

Max Beerbohm

You cannot make a man by standing a sheep on its hind legs. But by standing a flock of sheep in that position you can make a crowd of men.

Evan Esar

Statistics: The only science that enables different experts using the same figures to draw different conclusions.